The Telephone Bar
The Telephone Bar is located on a quiet Soi in South Pattaya known as Soi Batman.
There is a huge derelict club, with a big Batman sign here giving rise to the Soi’s name. The Telephone Bar has been on the Soi for many years, and if you were just passing by, you might think it unusual to see an old traditional style English phone box here. This is actually the main entrance. You open the door, step inside and ring the bell and then you are escorted inside.
Frank, Love Pattaya Thailand’s resident explorer and retired UK General Post Office worker, told us he was looking forward to visiting the Telephone Bar, especially after having experienced such a friendly, professional service at La Poste and Frank also discovered it was the oldest Gentleman’s club in Pattaya, first opening there doors some 11 Years Ago!
When Frank arrived at Soi Batman he walked towards the Telephone Bar, opened the phone box door, stepped inside and rang the bell. Shortly afterwards a female member of staff open the door, greeted him politely and in they went.
All the girls gathered and in unison said “Welcome to The Telephone Bar, we hope you have a good time!” Or something along those lines…
The girls were extremely helpful and explained that there was a V.I.P card which can be purchased for only 250baht which entitles you to your first drink FREE
He then started to think maybe this place was like a secret service telephone exchange, he had heard of places similar to this when reading James Bond books, recently and was imagining what it would be like to be a real secret agent.
The bar was similar to La Poste in that it had red luxury furnishings and exposed red brick décor, again it made him think about his old favourite pub in London.
As he sat at the bar, he was approached by a very elegant lady who introduced herself as gift. “She would make a very nice gift for someone!” He thought.
He introduced himself and as before ordered a round of drinks. When gift went off to get the drinks, Frank looked around the bar, observing the other agents with their lady contacts. He felt like he was in an exclusive Gentlemen’s club, maybe he was?
Gift returned and rapidly removed her uniform. Should he do the same? This happened before at the La Poste branch. He looked around and saw that all the other guys still had their shirts on so thought best to follow their lead.
All this time, Frank had been holding a medium sized bag, which he now lifted up onto his lap and opened. He then removed a large old Bakelite telephone and put it down on the table. “I have had this for some years now, and was wondering if you can help me make it work?” He explained that the dial still turned, but he had had no luck when trying to plug it in to a modern socket. “The cable just flops around, it’s no fun at all and I just can’t get through.” He explained.
Gift smiled and told Frank she was an experienced technician and could easily get his old phone working. She did remark that they may have to use a few modern appliances to get the old beast up and running. She then led Frank to the maintenance room, where they could have a better look at his dial and cable.
“Your dial is a bit rusty, need oil.” Gift remarked. Once oiled up Gift’s expert hands got Frank’s dial turning nicely. She simply poked her finger in the dialing hole, turned all the way and released. She repeated this many times, Frank was very pleased that his dial was now operational.
He then asked if Gift could take a look at his cable. He wanted something to firm it up, so that he didn’t have any problems when trying to plug it in. Gift fitted a new plug and gave Frank some special lubricant to help with the plug being connected into the socket. Such a professional, Frank thought to himself.
So after a full maintenance check it was time for Frank to head of home. As Frank got up to leave, all the girls got together and said “Thank you for coming to Telephone Bar, see you again soon!” He then stepped back outside onto Soi Batman and smiled to himself.
If you’re looking for an alternative afternoon of entertainment, the Telephone bar on Soi Batman will certainly ring your bell! And don’t forget, they open at 9 a.m. and serve FREE soft drinks and morning coffee!